who wears dark shades in the club.
Its another Saturday night when my friends and I decide that we will end the summer appropriately with a really cool NFL party promoted by a friend of ours and most importantly dj-ed by one of the cutest, talented (not nec in that order) dudes in the area. Let it be known that each and everyone of us (yes all four of us) were dressed especially cute. I actually left my home with intentions of having a good time and possible meeting a cute dude. Everything was goin pretty well -- i had the opportunity of almost meeting a dude I have a crush on. (He doesnt know my name but I'm alright with the dates (and the kids) that we've had in my dreams).
I had spotted The Ugly Napolean with his groupie looking chick earlier in the evening - he had made an extra effort to be noticed by dancin in the middle of the crowded walkway. I then found it funny that he found it necessary to wear sunglasses in the dark club at 11:30 pm. And then there was the inappropriateness of the tiiiggghhhhttt black muscle shirt.
But I digresss.. After not meeting the man of my dreams, the group decided to change the scence and move to the otherside of the club. Actually we split up. I was following my girl, the other tow ladies stayed where they were.
As we are walkin - I feel sumthin iickky rubbing up against my back. I let it go .. thinkin "Does this person think they are goin to walk thru me like some sci-fi movie?" The club is crowded but there is never a reason to push. So i brush that off.. And then there is a harder rub/push. I turn around and see that it is The Ugly Napolean- I ask him kindly "Can u please not push me?"..With an attitude he says, "please this is a crowded a@@ club - get over it." So I reply -"No really, Can you please not push me." There is more stuff comin out of his mouth but I dont hear/ care. But I patiently allow him to pass. Dude continues the say stuff.. i begin to boil.
Then the evil powers of the ghetto chick take over.. I took the gum out of my mouth and aimed for his bald head (which was ahead of me) SLAMDUNK. He turned around..I think he knew it was me. i bent down to him and said "What are you gonna do?" He begins to say sumthin along the lines of "F.U, you B". I'm not affected. I continue to ask " Is that what you call your mother?". He says something else.. I tell him to kiss my A@@. He says I have not A@@ I'm not impressed at the combacks. I again instruct him to use his lips wisely. I feel he should have had more in him. You know sumthin that could hurt my feelings. I really was insulted - My esteem is in such a place that he really couldnt get me (I still havent gotten over the inappropriate shirt that he had on). but then he pulled a fast one-- he says "you stink H_, you dont know where your father is." That did it-- I actually chuckled..Was that the best he could do? Of course i knew where my father was - he's been in my life for the last 29 years, its been of recent that his new address is in a plot 6 feet under in Brooklyn (I know exactly where he is). I kinda felt that one.. The UGLY Napolean took me for a ghetto chick.. He misunderstood. Only then did i really begin to lift my hands to kick his a@@. But low and behold sumone from behind grabbed my arm and was holding me back. I thought that this person holdin me wanted it tooo... But nope it was one of my girls. Now I'm embarrassed (how uncool to be a ghetto chick in a silk dress and beautiful shoes)
There are more cute guys coming into the party and i really dont want to be classified as a ghetto chick. Plus I am wearin one of the most prettiest shoes from my closet.. why in the world would i want to ruin them. Eventually - things settled down. Some dudes were like you really are too beautiful and dressed too nice to even stoop to his level. That worked - I was back to feeling cute. My new mantra is .. I will not be provoked by dudes with Napolean complexes who wear dark glasses in a club... I begin to meditate now!
